by Michelle
(UK)

We have been trying for 6 years and had two failed attempts with TS. We can’t do GS as we could not afford to go that road. 

Reply by Rayven

Traditional surrogacy is much different from gestational surrogacy. With traditional surrogacy, a woman is being asked to give up her own child. With gestational surrogacy, a woman is being asked to carry someone else’s child.

There are many gestational surrogates out there who have no emotional problems with carrying a child that has no relationship to them. They are able to clearly separate themselves from the baby because they know it is 100% not theirs. Many gestational surrogates know that they would not feel the same way were they going through a traditional surrogacy.

Add that to the fact that most agencies, laws, and lawyers are encouraging gestational surrogacy (at least here in the States) because there is no legal connection between a gestational surrogate and the baby she gives birth to. With traditional surrogacy, the surrogate mother must sign over her rights to the child.

They are still out there, you just need to find them!

Head over to our new Surrogacy Classified Ads section and post an ad.

Best wishes on your journey! 

by Jamie
(Troy, MO)

I have friends who have been trying to have a baby for almost 10 years now, and they’ve just lost their twins at 10 weeks. I’m considering offering to be a surrogate for them, but I was wondering how long the process takes, outside of the 9 months pregnancy, of course. I’m currently in college and I’ll have enough credits to start working in 15 months. Is it reasonable to assume that I could carry their child(ren) and give birth in this amount of time?

Reply by Rayven

The surrogacy process can take just a couple months to get going, or could take more than a year; it depends on several factors.

Fist, how ready are you both to getting started? Do they have a clinic in place? Is there clinic ready to interview/test a surrogate? Do you both have attorneys for your contracts?

After that first wave of organizational stuff is done (it can take a few weeks to get all that together) then there are contracts and testing. Contracts can be slow; it depends on your lawyers and if there are any issues with the contract that need to be hashed out. Testing can be slow if you go through your OB and have to wait for an appointment. Plan on a couple weeks to a couple months for these steps.

Once that is all done, then you need to get with the clinic to coordinate the transfer and get in sync with the intended mother or egg donor. How quick is this? It really depends on the clinic. Could be less than one month, could be three months.

Then, you may not have a successful first transfer. It could take 2 or 3 tries (spaced 1-3 months apart, depending on the clinic) before you are successful, if at all.

So it depends on a lot of factors.

I’d say, if you are all past that initial stage of organizing that I mentioned, if everything goes well and you are successful at your first transfer, then you should be able to complete a journey in your time frame. But you need to be prepared for the fact that it might take longer than that.

Best wishes!

by Kim G.
(Florida)

What is a fair price to ask for a traditional surrogacy? And should I use their lawyer or use my own?

Reply by Rayven

Hi Kim,

The fees a traditional surrogate mother should ask are going to vary from situation to situation. Most first time traditional surrogates will get between $15-22,000 for a base fee plus additional fees.

If you do not have a specific amount in mind, you may even want to wait to see how your potential intended parents feel about compensation.

You will want your own attorney. Your intended parents will pay for his fees.

by Christina Starling
(Los Angeles, CA)

I was just wondering for my English 21 research paper if a surrogate mother has any rights? 

Reply by Rayven

Christina,

Your question is very vague so I will answer it the best way that I can.

Does a surrogate mother have any rights? Yes.

She has the total and complete right to make all decisions regarding her own body. She can authorize or refuse any test against the intended parent’s wishes. She can choose to abort a fetus or choose not to abort a fetus irregardless of what her intended parents wish. Her rights to her body are hers alone.

Having said that, she may be in violation of a civil contract, if her contract states otherwise, but at the end of the day, a surrogate mother makes these decisions.

She also has the right not to allow her intended parents to attend appointments or even the birth itself.

I feel, however, that you are asking if the surrogate mother has any rights to the baby she gives birth to. The answer to that is, it depends.

In some countries where surrogacy is legal, a traditional and a gestational mother both have legal rights to the child born.

In America, a gestational surrogate mother does not have the legal right to keep the child for any reason.

Depending on the state, some traditional surrogate mothers may have to sign their rights away, and could successfully petition for custody of the child after birth.

Best wishes!

by Heidi Moore
(Niles, MI USA) 

Is there a company to work through that will be able to assist with any questions or concerns near Niles, Michigan? I am interested in finding out more information on the fees and stuff. Such as is the ob appointments, labor and delivery covered by the intended parents or my personal insurance? Would I get paid by the family to carry their child for them and if so how much do they pay?

Reply by Rayven

Heidi,

Many agencies will not work with surrogates in Michigan because compensation for surrogacy is illegal in Michigan. You can be a surrogate for a set of intended parents in Michigan, but you cannot get paid for it.

This can be avoided if you give birth out of state.

Your personal health insurance should cover you after you become pregnant, unless they specifically exclude surrogacy. This ideal set-up saves your intended parents thousands of dollars without costing you a penny.

Best wishes!