my husband’s ex wife is our surrogate

by Mandy Mae

My husband’s ex wife wants to be a surrogate for us. We’ve been married three years and he has a 10 year old daughter with his former wife. They have enjoyed a good friendship over the years as they have been divorced for more than 7 years.

What are your thoughts on this? She would be using my eggs, so the baby will be biologically mine.

I’m not sure how I feel about this. Yes, they have a good relationship, but is this situation ok? It feels sort of weird to me.


Reply by Rayven
This is a tough situation, but the bottom line is what you are comfortable with. If this makes you feel odd, or uncomfortable, then this is not the right solution for you.

There are so many things an intended mother gives up with surrogacy, she should not be made to feel miserable during the journey as well.

If you are not uncomfortable with your husband’s ex-wife, per se, but are more uncomfortable with how people will think about the situation, then that’s different. Who cares what others think? They’re not going to understand surrogacy anyways.

But if this situation itself is setting off red flags, find someone else. You and your husband are very lucky to have such a woman in your lives, but that doesn’t mean she should carry your child.

Best wishes!

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